« Do not forget the sadness or fear behind our angering moods. For us, it is a question of listening well, below resentment, to the small voice of our original states of mind. Often, anger is a so-called secondary emotion, which obscures a fear or sadness that is in fact the cause of our suffering. The mother who saw her child pass through without looking and who scolds him before taking him in her arms, relieved: she felt anger when fear was her first reflex. The same goes for our grudge when we are shown our contradictions and mistakes: at first there is the disappointment - sadness and disillusionment - of having made a mistake. And then, of course, alongside sadness and fear as sources of anger, worries and what is now called stress. »

« We must realize that resentment imprisons and alienates us: under its control, we lose time of happy or light life, devoting too much of our energy and our thoughts to rehashing ideas of vengeance, to desire punishment. An American psychologist who has worked on this theme, Steven Hayes, proposes to see resentment as a hook on which one is like two maggots to suffer and to giggle. The first skewered maggot is us; the second is the person who offended us. As long as we have hate in us, it's like we're holding ourselves on the hook. But the only way to get us is to first pick up the other, in other words to forgive him, so that we can in turn free us (because the other is on the way out of the hook, the fishermen will understand...). »

« In this regard, it should be noted that justice exists (social regulation) so that forgiveness (intra- and interpersonal regulation) can exist. Without justice, forgiveness would sometimes be careless. »